Dying, enraged living. Jump, unpredictably predictable, unprovoked. Swelling, spilling, anger independent. An external force, crushing down. It sustains, hatred, mortal energy. Innocence attacked. What just happened? The soul collapses.
My anger closed, inside. I try. I lose... “pop” …triggered again. Descent -- unknowingly, unthinkably, unreasonably. Emotion untethered, unleashed, released -- imprisoned by “correctness.”
Rage surfaces, a must! Seeking its own way, emerging, deep breath. I witness myself ... lobbing bombs, dandelions flicked, stomping ants. Cannon-fire. Me? Standing, close by and at distance, too far, above, looking down, watching, helpless.
Publishers hire “sensitivity readers.” NO, framing (reframing) sex, race, religion, gender, nation -- valued diversions, identities, entertainments! DO YOU BELIEVE IT? division, conflict, violence! YES, “Stop the offender, now!” Thanks to “sensitivities” I’m bottled, shaken ... .
Trust, low, no more?!? Feeling me, myself, yes, the material self: “Hide!” Pretend, or be found out… “Maybe I’ll post something on Facebook.” I’m tired, deceived, deceiving. Who should I appear to be today?
Li(v)es, I lead: I am reasonable, knowledgeable, in control … I”M NOT ANGRY! Truth? stop. sit, s t i l l. open -- Acquiesce, Radiantly, within Limitation -- turning to heart. submission, alignment, life. Sorrows beneath bitterness, hatred, contempt, anger dissolve, give way, resolve into Detachment, Acceptance, Reality, Freedom, Love, Unity: “Ya Baha ul Abha.”
I distinctly remember visiting the Bahá'í temple my junior year of high school. I remember the temple being so striking when we arrived. It was not something I was expecting in the middle of a suburb. Almost as striking as the temple itself was the peace I noticed from my teacher (Mr. B) and the other temple vistors. The sayings embroided along the walls all promoted unity. We are one. Something that I understood to some extent , but that got lost in the guidelines of my religion. Got lost in the details.
Like now. A price attached to your own emotional response. A system, institutions, just WAITING for you to be triggered. Lost in the details. Little to no…